01
We define ourselves with the things we're good at. From all the things we love to do. If you're good at painting, you're a painter. If you can sing, you're a singer and if you're good at swimming, you're a swimmer. But what if you're not so good at something you do? What does that make you?
I remember during summer break, I have scheduled a lot of summer activities with my friends and family. But when I received the bad news of not being included in the list of outright passed for our subject in Biochemistry, I contemplated wether to go or stay. I rejected the idea that I deserve that one summer full of happiness with the people important in my life. It affected me so much that I thought being failed means you don't deserve to have a vacation. I postponed everything and just waited to be happy. How pathetic right? It's crazy how seldom I let one aspect of my life define who I am and what I'm capable of. When in fact, being a medical student is just a part of my life and not my whole life. I have a 360 degree life outside medical school. I forgot that I'm a student, I'm still and always need to learn. Up until now, I regret that I didn't join that wholesome vacation. Just like what my parents told me, "Mahirap talaga ang medical school, marami ka pa iiyakan."
02
Speaking of iiyakan, I did cry. I think that was last Saturday. It's because of a passing of a really good friend from High School. I used to spend afternoons with their house, playing with her little sister during break time. Having lunch or kwentuhan as I wait for my brother to finish his class. We even had a group name, which is really important during those years in High school. It makes you feel you're not a loner. Fast forward, I never thought she would be gone too fast, we've had a reunion from few years ago and I noticed her declining health. I cried when I looked back at the two little photograph of us (me and my group of friends) and I saw her in that photo. I noticed that she wore the same pink polo shirt in the two separate photographs that I'm able to keep. I took it as a sign, to remember and pray for her soul always. When a person who became a part of your childhood memories died, it seems part of your inner child yearns for it. The same thing I felt when Kuya Kevin, died.
Kuya Kevin is my Grade 6 pedicab driver service. I hate to be late at school and every 6 am that I would hear a blowing whistle sound from a worn-out bicycle pump and a squeak of a pedicab wheels stopping a few meters away from our house in Cavite, I feel relieved. My younger self would prepare my red stroller bag which is too heavy to carry. But Kuya Kevin managed to carry lots of it from different kids. He also accepts service from other schools nearby. Kuya Kevin is a short man, I guess at that time he's on his thirty's. He would always curse and get mad when some of the kids are attempting to jump or hang their legs outside. When we moved in Manila to study for college, I left some of these memories behind. When we heard about his death, I kinda felt sad.
